So it’s been a while since I’ve spoken about me….
With my recent divorce (talaq) I thought that maybe it’s a good idea to try some new things. I have been divorced now 2 months… (Yes….. I’m still within my iddah period)… and separated for 3 months before.
Moving forward is a bit difficult… Being in something for so many years then it ending does have its effects. The kids being young are still very confused. Also trying to re-adjust to living with my parents. Now with having the girls and compromising my rules with my parents. Then there’s having someone next to you that has become a norm. Trying to support my kids financially with very little help from their father…. (No I am not trying to bad mouth him – just saying it like it is)
So it’s been a difficult 5 months, and after my iddah I think it’s gonna get a more hectic. But they say that nothing good comes without a challenge… So I’m gonna take this challenge head on LOL
There are things that I want to do though. Maybe go study and finally get my license.
The iddah is a challenge on its own…
Me loving my Bling bling and my make up, and being without it for 3 months is getting to me a bit. The not going out part I can deal with….I was never someone to go out. I work so that is my everyday outing.
My parent’s house being so busy, it’s difficult for me to walk freely all the time. Men walking in and out at any given time. Then there is the invading of privacy. I love my family very much, I do… but sometimes you just wanna be alone with your kids… or just alone. And they help me quite a bit through this.
The emotion that sometimes goes with it doesn’t really affect me though. The more I look at it the more I see that I have made the right decision. I can live without the traumas and hurt that came with what was. But that’s over now, and a new leaf is turned.
My life seems happy and more fulfilling. I laugh more, read more doing things I love. Spend more time with my kids and with my family and friends... I’m renewing old friendships at least trying to. I can see that people are more themselves around me than they’ve been in years.
Right now I’m contempt with myself and happy … not just ok happy, but genuinely happy with myself… LOL
